Are people holding you back from being successful?

Or are you afraid of leaving someone behind?

ID-100134851Nobody can hold you back or have any influence in your life if you do not (in some way or other) give permission to do so.  They can only have the impact you are allowing them to have.

Crab mentality

Take a bucket full of crabs. If one crab attempts to escape from the bucket of live crabs, the other crabs will pull it back down, rather than allowing it to get free. Often, the crabs will wait until the courageous one has nearly escaped before pulling it back into the bucket. It’s an odd phenomenon and relates to us humans. Why do we more often pull each other down, instead of supporting each other’s growth?

When a person changes, it automatically has us look at our selves. And the mirror goes up really without anyone doing anything. People question their path, what they are doing and if what they think is “right” still holds true. So if you are changing (and funnily enough it’s often our outside world who notices these changes before we do), your environment has to a) check in with themselves and b) is confronted with the possibility of you moving on, i.e. leaving them.

Additionally, people will usually fiercely defend their current beliefs for 3 reasons

  • they don’t have enough information
  • they feel threatened
  • they are scared because if their beliefs don’t hold true anymore, they have to change too. And change is scary, remember? It entails going into the unknown and that can feel terrifying.

You are the reflection of the 5 people closest to you

Tune in to what frequency those 5 peeps are vibrating at and you’ll get a good indicator of where you’re at {or where you were}. As we start to grow, our frequencies change. We simply vibrate differently. And if we try to cover up that “being different” with a mask of “sameness”, pretending to be like our peer group because we are terrified of getting expelled… it usually backfires. If you pretend to be someone you are not, you are lacking integrity. To yourself and others. Not being authentic does not pay off! We go against ourselves, playing a role that doesn’t resonate with who we truly are. Keeping up appearances burns up a lot of energy and creates stress in our systems. At best we feel tired, worst case we get sick. And in most cases, we get found out anyway. People sense more than they know or can consciously explain. And if you are sending out incongruent messages/vibrations, they will start feeling uneasy about and with you.

If the people closest to you represent who you were a while back, it may be time to lovingly detach and change the Rolodex. Maybe they will change with you but don’t count on it. Everybody has their own time frame and way of doing things. No way is better or worthier than the other. They are simply different. Lead the way by being a shining example of courage, wisdom, and love.

Spiritual Snobbery

Don’t fall into the trap of spiritual arrogance. We all go through our unique processes in our very own time. Some learn faster, some slower, some not at all. Can you for a 100% certainty say what’s best for another? I am often astounded at the amount of judgment goes on with so-called “spiritual” people! So save yourself the hassle and stress of evangelizing your friends. Just because you have discovered new aspects of life does not mean that everybody else will be as passionate about your new way as you are. By all means, help those who ask for help; share your enthusiasm for life and what you believe in but don’t be upset if your environment doesn’t understand you.

The ones that matter will understand and the ones that don’t, don’t matter. 

There is a difference in leaving behind and moving in different directions. True soul connections that were made for a lifetime will remain strong because they are built on a foundation of love, trust, and tolerance. They might go through phases of closeness and distance while you explore different paths but they will not be destroyed. Trust your connections of love and have faith in them. There are also people who are better loved at a distance.

Protect your energy and enthusiasm

You might want to rethink who you share your new ideas and thoughts with. Some people are great to talk to as soon as you have an inspiration, they are valuable sounding boards, encouraging and uplifting. Others are better informed once you are successful.

Evolution is an act of courage – believe in yourself and jump!

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