The real reason you are feeling this way is not what you think. It all comes down to really tuning in and asking yourself if the life you are living is authentic and moving you towards experiencing your Grandest Self.
If we have gone off course, even a little, by continuing to make decisions based on outdated limiting beliefs or patterns then the writing is on the wall. We end up stressed out, drained and wondering why we feel so stuck and worn down.
Would you agree…..
That we ALL want to make a positive change in some area of our lives?
The struggle to move forward can be difficult because breaking through the limiting patterns and beliefs that hold you back is a systematic process. However, once you know this system, you can free yourself from their chains and move forward with grace, ease, and energy!
“If you are aware then you can do something. If you are not aware, you cannot fight it.” -Dr. Roy Martina
And this is why the first step to making any change in your life is to…
Often the limiting beliefs and patterns that hold us back in life are invisible to us and work behind the scenes to dictate the way we act and the decisions we make. They can continue to have a negative impact on various areas of our lives if we don’t take action.
STEP #1: Become Aware
If you were to look in to your past right now, with crystal clear eyes, can you pinpoint any particular thoughts or beliefs that you were given that you now think…..
- Whoa, this isn’t right.
- This isn’t how I live life.
- This is not who I am.
A Few Common Limiting Beliefs
- You must be thin to feel beautiful.
- You must put other’s needs before your own in order to be loving.
- I still need to learn more before I can become successful.
- I don’t have enough time to do all the thing I have to do to be successful.
or …..That you have to work really, really hard to be successful.
You might feel that if you don’t work yourself to the brink of exhaustion that you are lazy and that you will NEVER be successful. So because of this belief, you will continue to work and not take time out for yourself which eventually compromises your health, relationships and contentment with life.
Logic Alone Won’t Win
And of course, logically we know that these limiting beliefs are just not true!
But did you know that lasting decisions are made using a combination of both emotion and logic?
This is why we must get to the root of the fears that hold us back.
In the words of Daniel L. Siegel, M.D., your “brain is a relationship organ.” Your greatest fears, as a human being, are connected to not fulfilling the universal drives, which activate our most core emotional fears of rejection, abandonment, inadequacy, loss of self or the unknown, and the like.
We were born to THRIVE, not merely survive!
The Source Of Our Limiting Beliefs
- Essentially they are just a product of our conditioning.
- Often instilled early in childhood but this isn’t always the case.
- Your mind created a generalization around certain life events and from then on you have had a habitual thought pattern about this.
- These patterns become negative when they hold you back from taking positive action in your life.
Although the first step is to become aware of the limiting beliefs that hold you back, if you want to stop them from operating in your life, it isn’t enough just to identify and acknowledge them.
This is because even though logically you may be aware that you “don’t have to work yourself to the bone to be successful,” your subconscious mind is still conditioned to continue to feel like you are “lazy” if you don’t. The key is to work with the subconscious mind.
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My Personal Breakthrough
I was actually brought up in a very proper English family where understatement is key. Therefore, a big part of my conditioning was that you should absolutely never draw attention to yourself. You should make sure that you don’t become the focus of attention. Meaning, of course, that you don’t dress too nicely or make yourself too pretty. Our aim was to be purely understated.
So even as a young child, I would have these sneeze attacks where I would sneeze thirty or forty times and there was nothing I could do about it. I couldn’t stop, but when I would have them I remember my family would say, “oh you are just drawing attention to yourself. It’s just attention seeking.” So I had to let go of that belief and really step into my power and say….
This is who I am and I am okay with that.
So shining your light can be really challenging if you have been brought up in a way where shining your light has not been safe or has been labeled or condemned as something you should not do.”
Pinpoint Your Patterns
By being able to pinpoint the patterns and excuses that we use to hold us back in life, we are also shining more light on those blind spots that, until now, we haven’t really been aware of.
It’s safe to say, your subconscious mind has been waiting for you to take conscious charge of your life, on a consistent basis, ever since you’ve had the cognitive abilities to do so (for most, between 20 to 25 years of age)!
Accept & Let Go
1.Recognize, and WRITE DOWN the limiting belief that is holding you back from taking that next step forward in your self-improvement and evolution at this particular time. This is anything that you notice coming up, when you think of your goals and dreams where you think…”Oh, I can’t do that.”
2.Using the Emotional Wheel Chart, connect this limiting belief to a particular and specific feeling. What is the feeling that you now know is motivating you to continue re-creating this pattern in your mind.
3.Now take another look at the Emotional Wheel Chart and find the opposite emotion to this. For example, if you have been held back by feeling helpless, the opposite emotion would be loving.
4.STOP, LISTEN, BREATHE. This very important step allows us to take a moment to become present and feel into our heart, before we take action. This is one of the most valuable tools we have access to.
Place your hands on your heart and say out loud with conviction.
- “I delete, delete, delete all feelings of _______________(the feeling associated with the limiting pattern) and I replace it now with _____________(the positive polar emotion from the chart).”
- I love and accept myself if I am not ready to let go of ________ (limiting feeling).
- And I love and accept myself if I am ready to let go of ________ (limiting feeling) and step into _____________ (empowering feeling) and into my power today.
STOP, LISTEN, BREATHE.
Let out a big sigh and imagine this limiting belief and the emotion connected to it leaving your body.
Remember your subconscious mind does not speak in words.
Visualization and tapping into feeling are the most powerful form of communication we have with the deeper levels of our mind.
You can easily and effectively begin to reach these layers of the subconscious mind by entering a more relaxed and aware state through the use of brain-training and mindfulness.
To finally break through the limiting beliefs and patterns that hold you back, we recommend that you download this specialized brain training for free and listen to it once per day.
You will be absolutely amazed at how quickly and effortlessly you see these old habits dissolve as you step fully and proudly into your power.
You can get started now.
Siegel, Daniel J. (2010). Mindsight: The New Science of Personal Transformation. NY: Bantam Books.
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